Hugs, Kisses, I Love You's

The time most valuable with my little ones are the times they hug me, kiss me, and say "I love you."

If that is true for you, then what is the most valuable time for them with you?



Single moms, I know it is hard. I have seen what you go through. Keep going. It is worth it. You are the difference in your kid loving or hating. You are molding their gifts, desires, and worth! Step-dads, be careful, gentle, caring, loving, and consistent. They need you, but they need THE BEST of you! There is hope! I have seen it!

Soup Kitchen

So the oldest boy has been showing signs of leading a sheltered life. My solution: Soup Kitchen! Lets go see "real life" and go feed the homeless. I called and we went. We sat through the church service they needed to sit through to get a free meal. Then we went down and filled drinks, handed out food, cleaned the tables, swept the floor and mopped up. We were there for about 4 hours.

There is not a lot to say about this. It was all internal changes that are deep inside him. He let it soak in, and it has changed him. It is interesting how I went and it changed me for about a day, then I forgot we even went. But yet it changed how he looks at things and he never talks about it. Which is opposite of how kids normally work. They normally will talk about what they are thinking about and then it will be gone in an instant.

It came up because EVERY meal we would have he would say he hated, or would not want to eat it. It was things that he would end up loving or eat the whole thing once we got him started. At the Soup Kitchen almost everyone there thanked us over and over again. Not just once! Ever since then, he eats his meals and says "Thank you."

The lesson I learned once again? Don't pass up on opportunities to serve. It helps mold who you are. And helps you think about others and not yourself. Little things build up to be big things, whether good or bad. Build a lot of GOOD little things with your child and see what outcome your child has when it comes to the big things.

Single moms and step-dads. You are doing something AWESOME with your life. It is full of purpose and rewards beyond measure. You are needed! You are loved! Be thankful!

Calling the Teacher

So the oldest son has been going to school with nothing other than his homework. I make sure of it. I am puzzled when he returns home everyday with Pokemon cards, bakagons, and various other toys. I always ask him where he got them and then he begins to lie to my face and tell me he found them, or his friend gave it to him. He slipped up one day and said he traded a kid for them. That is when it hit the fan. Son....or soon to be son right now....what did you have to trade since I sent you with nothing. "I traded some stuff I had at school," he said. "What stuff?" I gently responded with. "Uh.....I don't know."

This went on for days. Then I told him that lying, cheating, stealing, and bullying were not allowed and if he would not tell me then I would call his teacher. He thought I was joking and told me that would be fine. So with his permission, HA!, I called her. At this point I am thinking he is a bully, which is hilarious since he is a tall skinny kid that is so nice and sweet. But how else was he getting all those things every day.

His teacher was glad I called and told me right when I said who I was "Oh, that kids a Trader." I asked what he was trading and it ends up my son is the freaking God Father of the 3rd grade. He is very smart and does real well in class and earns behavior bucks. Then he trades those to kids for their toys. What a kid. Trading a spot in the front of the line for a $5 toy. Sheesh!

This is where trust is so important. Delicately we talked about the whole situation and I had to call him out on it without being upset so he could learn. He had to trust me to become a better person. Keep that in mind. His trust in me is making HIM a better person. He now knows what it is to rip someone off, or what happens if you trade in a negative way. He is thinking about others because I could slow him down and make him see the bigger picture.

That is parenting. It shows itself at weird times. I have noticed that good parents prepare for those times by being a person their kids can love and trust when times are easy. We work hard with him to let him know that we care and talk with him on his level. See, he really does care about others and does not want to hurt them. But he did not see the big picture and see what happens on their side.

Step-dads and Single Moms. Trust in your kids, Love them, and guide them when it is easy. That will provide with you times to trust, love, and guide them when the tough times arise. THERE IS HOPE! I am proof. This family that has let me into their hearts is better than imaginable. Let God do the hard work.

Neon Green Poop

I told you that I would write this blog to give advice to step-dads who are coming to a house with a mom and her kids....

I am sitting at church the other day and of course our son who is having trouble going to the bathroom tells me he has to go bad! Translation...he already went in his pull-up and he doesn't want to get in trouble and make you think he is trying to go to the bathroom.

So we go to the bathroom and as he pulls down his pull-up I see NEON GREEN POOP!!!!! Now it was mearly a streak, I should not even say it was really poop, but never-the-less something NEON GREEN was there. At this point I am freaking out! We need to go to the ER. So we make sure he washes his sweet little innocent ,yet dirtiest I have ever been around, hands with soap. Then we go sit next to mommy and tell her we need to leave immediately. After I told her why I am pretty sure she laughed out loud IN CHURCH! She said "they ate those purple gummy spiders we gave them last night." I looked at her with true confusion as if she had not heard a word I said. I mean, our kid is dying, he has NEON GREEN poop. Get with it mommy, how have you and the kids survived this long without me? She then explains to me that whenever they eat anything with purple dye in it that they have different colors of poop. WOW! Didn't see that one coming.

Next thing on the agenda. Feeding them Green Dye to see what happens. ;-)

Single Moms and Step-dads. God is good all the time and will help you mold together. Patience, Trust, and Love are the keys to all of your happiness. God Bless you! THERE IS HOPE!